JAG Nabs Another CDC Official

U.S. Navy JAG investigators have apprehended yet another Center for Disease Control and Prevention official, this time capturing Karen Hacker, the Center’s Director for Chronic Disease Prevention and Health Promotion (NCCDPHP), a position she assumed in August 2019. A JAG source told Real Raw News that Hacker had recently co-authored an “academic paper” on the importance of “Population Control Amid Emerging and Ongoing Pandemics.” In it, she emphasized a necessity for mandatory mail-in voting in the 2024 presidential election, citing the resilience of SarsCov2, a rise in cases of “White Lung” pneumonia in children, and inexplicable surges of hepatitis, measles, and fungal meningitis. Hacker distributed her manifesto across the CDC and to Biden regime officials, our source said.

“She isn’t expressing opinion. She was working on an agenda. She even proposed that voters show proof of boosters before being allowed into a polling station. Her paper, or whatever you want to call it, and I call it sinister shit, even discussed medical confinement. Admiral Crandall thoroughly read the paper and found evidence to substantiate charges of conspiracy to commit treason, abuse of office, and defrauding the country,” our source said.

Investigators, he added, spotted Hacker leaving her posh home in Atlanta’s affluent Buckhead suburb Friday evening and approached her with a military arrest warrant. She gawked at them incredulously, a nervous titter escaping her lips. She gazed fixedly, soberly, and said, “This cannot be legitimate.”

“It’s legit,” one of the investigators replied, “and we’d appreciate you not resisting. We really hate it when you people resist or run. Got any guns or knives on you?”

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Hacker admitted she had a pistol in her purse. The investigators seized her possessions, cuffed her, and drove her to a processing center in South Florida.

Once there, our source said, Hacker was surprisingly talkative: She claimed she had written only fragments of the paper and that the CDC’s despotic director, Mandy K. Cohen, who rose to power in the wake of Rochelle Walensky’s hanging, had ghostwritten 40 of 64 pages. JAG’s analysis affirmed Hacker’s contention; the paper’s syntax amalgamated human writers and ChatGPT. Nonetheless, Hacker endorsed, signed, and disseminated a proposal clearly aimed at subverting the 2024 election.

“Here’s your problem: We have you, not Cohen. If you can lead us to her, and we know she’s not in Atlanta, maybe we can work out a deal,” an interrogator told Hacker.

Hacker said that Cohen had emailed her the pages, instructing her to incorporate and sign her findings.

“No idea where she is,” Hacker told her interrogator.

“Want to know why your signature is there and Cohen’s isn’t? She labeled you expendable, to be hurled beneath a bus. If you can’t help us with Cohen, we have nothing else to talk about right now,” the interrogator said.

Our source said Hacker will soon get a trip to Guantanamo Bay.

RRN asked the source to comment on JAG’s seemingly indecipherable arrest strategy: why it expends time and resources pursuing middle-management while kingpins of injustice are still wreaking havoc on and burglarizing the populace. He said opportunity dictates JAG’s unorthodox and unpredictable approach to apprehending Deep Staters who have committed acts of treason against the United States.

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“As I’m sure you’ve heard before, a lot of these evildoers, and they are truly evil, are hiding all over the planet, from Ukraine to Antarctica. Most aren’t sitting around waiting to get picked up. Yes, we are ramping up global operations, and if it was my choice, we’d drop a MOAB on CDC headquarters. But we can’t just pull a Vladimir Putin in the U.S.A., at least right now,” he said.