Marines Fight FEMA Near Texas Panhandle Inferno

White Hats investigating the unstoppable blaze surging through the Texas Panhandle fought a pitched battle against renegade FEMA agents Thursday afternoon; a confrontation led to a firefight that left three agents dead and one begging U.S. Marines to spare his life.

Over the last week, a raging inferno has charred over a million acres of land, destroyed 700 homes, and killed or displaced thousands of head of cattle vital to our nation’s food supply. As of this writing, the fire has ruined 1,400 square miles of prairie and is only 15% contained. The Biden regime has blamed manmade climate change and an unusual spate of warm weather last week as catalysts for the firestorm.

However, White Hats have a different working theory: the cabal started the fire intentionally, for reasons not entirely clear.

A source in General Eric M. Smith’s office told Real Raw News that U.S. Army Cyber Command overheard a conversation between a ranking State Department official and a Federal Emergency Management Agency supervisor in Oklahoma on Wednesday. The source wouldn’t name the individuals, but he said their conversation included phrases such as “the fire is the best thing to ever happen to Texas,” “let Texas burn,” and “that’ll teach [Governor Greg] Abbott a lesson,” and concluded with the FEMA official saying he had already dispatched agents to the city of Fritch, on the outskirts of the Smokehouse Creek fire.

General Smith, our source said, knew an immutable fact: where FEMA goes, trouble follows.

“We have too much bad blood with FEMA. They’re an infestation, like roaches, and just as hard to exterminate. Squash one, more scurry out. Gen. Smith wanted to know what they were up to, so he sent small teams to different parts of the disaster area to get a look around,” our source said.

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By the time the Marines showed up, FEMA had already set up emergency relief centers at a church and a school gymnasium south of the Grape Vine Creek fire. The Marines discreetly investigating those locations for signs of federal treachery on the populace were shocked to see FEMA personnel actually administering aid to displaced citizens. FEMA had a triage center and had provided shelter and sustenance to refugees.

“It was very un-FEMAlike,” our source said.

However, Marines surveying damage near Fritch met a face of FEMA with which they were more familiar. While patrolling Highway 136, close to the Windy Duce fire and the eastern shore of Lake Meredith, the Marines encountered a 4-man FEMA team trying to force a rancher to vacate his undamaged property. The Marines witnessed the federal Gestapo shove the frail, elderly man to the ground and rummage through his pockets, then moved to intervene.

They made a tactical approach, then commanded FEMA to unhand and step away from the bruised man, who seemed thoroughly confused by the situation. At that point, one FEMA agent, ostensibly the guy in charge, said FEMA had unilateral control of the disaster area and would treat military interlopers as enemy combatants.

The lead Marine tried futilely to defuse the encounter; he gave the FEMA agents a chance to leave the premises unharmed, but the lead agent belligerently refused the overture and reached for a sidearm on his hip, a move that forced the Marines’ hand.

In an instant, two of the four FEMA agents fell dead, their bodies zipped by 5.56 rounds from the Marines’ M4 carbines. The third agent died to Marine fire as he tried to take the rancher hostage. Meanwhile, the fourth agent had fallen to his knees and begged for mercy, asking the Marines to spare his life and saying he was just following orders. He was taken into custody.

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“This was an unfortunate thing—for FEMA. It’s important to note that FEMA is bifurcated—it employs 20,000, and about ¾ of them are corrupt to the core. The other quarter is just people doing a job and working for what they consider a benevolent agency. But make no mistake, it’s Deanne Criswell calling the shots, causing the problems,” our source said.

In closing, we asked our source if White Hats had determined the cause of the fires.

“We have nothing definite. But we’re looking at every avenue from someone tossing a match to direct energy weapons like what was used to burn Maui,” he said.